This week, families across Louisiana and beyond were shaken by the horrifying news out of Shreveport. On April 19, 2026, eight children were killed in a domestic violence tragedy that also left two women injured. Police said the violence happened across two homes and was domestic-related. It is a devastating reminder that abuse inside a relationship or family can become deadly, especially when warning signs are ignored or danger is minimized.

Stories like this are painful to read, but they also force us to face something real: domestic violence is not always loud at first. Sometimes it begins with control, fear, jealousy, threats, isolation, humiliation, or the feeling that you are constantly trying to keep someone calm so everyone stays safe. The National Domestic Violence Hotline says abuse can include patterns of intimidation, control, emotional abuse, financial abuse, sexual coercion, and physical violence.

If you have a deep feeling that something is not right in your relationship, that feeling matters.

Warning signs to pay attention to

Abuse is not only physical. It can also look like:

• extreme jealousy or possessiveness
• monitoring your phone, location, or messages
• isolating you from friends, family, or support
• controlling money or access to transportation
• constant criticism, humiliation, or blame
• threats toward you, your children, pets, or themselves
• pressuring or forcing sexual activity
• punching walls, destroying property, or frightening behavior meant to intimidate
• making you feel afraid of how they will react if you disagree, leave, or set a boundary

Many people talk themselves out of their own instincts because they think, “It hasn’t gotten that bad yet.” But fear is not a small thing. Control is not a small thing. Having to manage another person’s rage is not a small thing.

If children are involved, their safety matters too

Children do not have to be physically attacked to be harmed by a violent home. Living around threats, screaming, intimidation, instability, or fear can deeply affect them. And as this week’s tragedy in Shreveport painfully shows, children can also become direct victims when domestic violence escalates. Reports on the case tied the killings to a domestic situation and a family crisis.

If you are feeling unsafe, it is not overreacting to think about a safety plan for both you and your children.

Leaving can be the most dangerous time

One of the hardest truths about abuse is that the danger can increase when someone tries to leave. That does not mean you should stay. It means you deserve a careful plan, not pressure, panic, or shame.

A safe exit is often less about making a dramatic announcement and more about quietly preparing.

Safer ways to prepare

If you are in a violent or controlling situation, focus on safety, privacy, and support.

You may want to:

• tell one trusted person what is happening
• keep important documents where you can grab them quickly
• set aside medication, keys, cash, and essentials for you and your children
• memorize important phone numbers
• create a code word with someone you trust so they know when to call for help
• think through where you could go in an emergency
• teach children how to call emergency services if age-appropriate
• avoid arguing in rooms with weapons or hard surfaces, like kitchens or bathrooms, if a situation starts escalating
• be careful with shared devices, passwords, location sharing, and phone tracking

If it is safe to do so, keep records of threats, injuries, damaged property, stalking, or abusive messages. Documentation can matter later.

You do not have to prove enough pain to ask for help

A lot of people wait because they think they need one final terrible incident before they are “allowed” to call it abuse. That is a cruel lie people get taught by fear.

You do not need to wait for a headline.
You do not need to wait for a bruise.
You do not need to wait until the children are traumatized.
You do not need to wait until someone says, “Now it’s serious.”

If you feel controlled, frightened, trapped, or unsafe, it is already serious.

Getting help is a strong move

Reaching out for help is not weakness. It is protection. It is strategy. It is love for yourself and for your children.

If you are in immediate danger, call emergency services right away.

If you are not in immediate danger but need support, a domestic violence hotline, local shelter, advocate, or trusted person can help you build a safety plan that fits your real life. You do not have to figure this out alone.

And if this week’s tragedy in Shreveport teaches us anything, it is this: warning signs are not “just relationship problems” when fear, control, threats, and violence are present. They are signals to take seriously, because lives may depend on it.